HomeHome  PortalPortal  FAQFAQ  SearchSearch  RegisterRegister  MemberlistMemberlist  Log in  

Share | 
 

 how to become less shy!

View previous topic View next topic Go down 
AuthorMessage
Kristina
Ingalls Friend for Life
Ingalls Friend for Life
avatar

Number of posts : 6963
Location : Hogwarts
Mood :

PostSubject: how to become less shy!   Mon May 04, 2009 3:50 pm

I'm rather shy when it comes to meeting new people face to face, and it can get rather annoying sometimes. I've asked a couple friends on how to overcome this, but does anyone on here have any advice?
Back to top Go down
View user profile
Gin
Ingalls Friend for Life
Ingalls Friend for Life
avatar

Number of posts : 5924
Location : Curled up with a great book.
Mood :

PostSubject: Re: how to become less shy!   Mon May 11, 2009 2:11 pm

Maybe you should just have a couple of questions for them. Like maybe something you know they are interested in...that way you would feel that they are thinking more about themselves than you. Its also making them feel important.
From there you may then find it easy to get a bigger conversation going....??




It is the lack of Christianity that has brought us where we are. Not a lack of churches or religious forms but of the real thing in our hearts. LIW.....Words From a Fearless Heart
Back to top Go down
View user profile
bethandmanly
Dean's Dedicated Diva
Dean's Dedicated Diva
avatar

Number of posts : 7312
Location : In a book
Mood :

PostSubject: Re: how to become less shy!   Tue May 12, 2009 11:23 pm

Hope you don't mind an old gal putting her oar in. :haha:

I am going to tell you something that will get huge chuckles out of everyone on the forum who knows me really well: I was a very shy kid [Waits for laughter to die down.]

Personally, I think there is too much emphasis put on turning shy kids into extroverts. It's annoying. Some kids are just shy and that's who God made them to be. I like Gin's idea of having a couple of questions for them, because one thing the majority of people like to talk about is themselves; and as Gin pointed out, it makes them feel important because you are expressing interest in them.

I'm still anxious in new situations and around new people because I feel like I have to perform, like the real me isn't good enough or someone they would like. I've never been able to shake that. I still walk away from conversations shaking my head every once in a while wondering why I said something so stupid. No one else probably thought it was stupid, but I am overly critical.

Take baby steps when meeting new people. Ask about them and let them do the talking, then perhaps you'll find something you're both interested in and build on that. You could also put yourself in new situations on a more regular basis; and though this sounds corny, practice a conversation you might have with someone you meet, in the comfort of your own home. Do it in front of a mirror [Sounding more dumb all the time, isn't it?] so that you can see your mannerisms. Kind of like practicing to give an oral report at school. Dress in a way that feels comfortable to you. When meeting new people it's probably not the best time to try on a new outfit that you're not sure of. It will make you feel self-conscious.

Most of all, remember to feel good about yourself. That's easier said than done--I'm still working on it at the age of 40--but honestly, we are our own worst critics. What we believe other people think of us is probably not even close to reality. Being polite, approachable, and interested in the people you meet will help you feel more comfortable face to face.

Good luck!


Photobucket
Back to top Go down
View user profile http://ccmalandrinos.com/
Kristina
Ingalls Friend for Life
Ingalls Friend for Life
avatar

Number of posts : 6963
Location : Hogwarts
Mood :

PostSubject: Re: how to become less shy!   Wed May 13, 2009 3:02 pm

thank you for the great advice, bethandmanly! truthfully, I'm less shy around friends and other people, but when it comes to talking to a guy for the first time, particularly the one at my high school I've had a crush on, thats when I become really shy! my friend has been telling me to smile and him and say hi, so I am working on that, and then if I'm lucky enough to actually have a conversation with him, I'll use your advice, see what he's interested in and not talk about myself too much. I'm just always paranoid about looking nice, not having frizzy hair (which is rare for me) and if I actually do talk to him, not sounding completely stupid and obvious that I have a crush on him (word would get around if he did find out because his brother is in my grade!)

but I have to say thanks again for the advice from both of you. I definitley want to be less shy, and not just around the guy I mentioned above that I probably talked about far too much.

**and bethandmanly, I like having advice from people who are older than I am, because they often have more experience in the situation I'm having trouble with!**
Back to top Go down
View user profile
Robinsgirl
Frontier Traveler
Frontier Traveler


Number of posts : 329
Location : Ohio
Mood :

PostSubject: Re: how to become less shy!   Tue Jun 02, 2009 12:05 am

My mom always tells me not to be shy because its arrogence. Personally I didnt get this until one day when i was being all shy and I thought.. hey. Why am I shy? because I'm afraid this person will think I'm stupid. Hmmmm. So I'm worried about what that person will think about me. That's when I kinda sorta got it. And when I realized I was working too hard to feel loved is when I really got it. I dont know if its the same with you, but that helped me a lot.


Sometimes life throws you under the bus. You gotta hold on for dear life. Don't waste one single day.

==============================================================================================

I wonder how I find myself with the greatest boy ever! <3 He loves me in spite of my issues.
Back to top Go down
View user profile
Guest
Guest



PostSubject: Re: how to become less shy!   Thu Sep 09, 2010 10:35 am

Nothing wrong with being shy and quit..Iam still a shy and qut person.I don't think i will probly ever overcome this..I kind of just accpected myself being shy.I've learned is i need to nice the person well enough and like them and trust them.before i can really open up to some one.
Back to top Go down
Sponsored content




PostSubject: Re: how to become less shy!   

Back to top Go down
 
how to become less shy!
View previous topic View next topic Back to top 
Page 1 of 1

Permissions in this forum:You cannot reply to topics in this forum
 :: Walnut Grove Community :: The Schoolhouse: Teen Hangout-
Jump to: