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 Fiona Apple

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Rob
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PostSubject: Fiona Apple   Wed Nov 21, 2012 8:37 am

Singer-songwriter Fiona Apple cancelled her South American tour. She posted the reason on Facebook. I don't normally cry at 7:30 in the morning...

~~~

It's 6pm on Friday,and I'm writing to a few thousand friends I have not met yet. I am writing to ask them to change our plans and meet a little while later.

Here's the thing.I have a dog Janet, and she's been ill for almost two years now, as a tumor has been idling in her chest, growing ever so slowly. She's almost 14 years old now.I got her when she was 4 months old. I was 21 then, an adult officially - and she was my child.


She is a pitbull, and was found in Echo Park, with a rope around her neck, and bites all over her ears and face. She was the one the dogfighters use to puff up the confidence of the contenders.

She's almost 14 and I've never seen her start a fight ,or bite, or even growl, so I can understand why they chose her for that awful role. She's a pacifist. Janet has been the most consistent relationship of my adult life, and that is just a fact.

We've lived in numerous houses, and jumped a few make shift families, but it's always really been the two of us. She slept in bed with me, her head on the pillow, and she accepted my hysterical, tearful face into her chest, with her paws around me, every time I was heartbroken, or spirit-broken, or just lost, and as years went by, she let me take the role of her child, as I fell asleep, with her chin resting above my head. She was under the piano when I wrote songs, barked any time I tried to record anything, and she was in the studio with me all the time we recorded the last album.


The last time I came back from tour, she was spry as ever, and she's used to me being gone for a few weeks every 6 or 7 years.

She has Addison's Disease, which makes it dangerous for her to travel since she needs regular injections of Cortisol, because she reacts to stress and to excitement without the physiological tools which keep most of us from literally panicking to death. Despite all of this, she’s effortlessly joyful and playful, and only stopped acting like a puppy about 3 years ago. She's my best friend and my mother and my daughter, my benefactor, and she's the one who taught me what love is.

I can't come to South America. Not now.

When I got back from the last leg of the US tour, there was a big, big difference. She doesn't even want to go for walks anymore. I know that she's not sad about aging or dying. Animals have a survival instinct, but a sense of mortality and vanity, they do not. That’s why they are so much more present than people.

But I know that she is coming close to point where she will stop being a dog, and instead, be part of everything. She’ll be in the wind, and in the soil, and the snow, and in me, wherever I go.
I just can't leave her now, please understand. If I go away again, I’m afraid she'll die and I won't have the honor of singing her to sleep, of escorting her out. Sometimes it takes me 20 minutes to pick which socks to wear to bed. But this decision is instant. These are the choices we make, which define us.

I will not be the woman who puts her career ahead of love and friendship. I am the woman who stays home and bakes Tilapia for my dearest, oldest friend. And helps her be comfortable, and comforted, and safe, and important.

Many of us these days, we dread the death of a loved one. It is the ugly truth of Life, that keeps us feeling terrified and alone. I wish we could also appreciate the time that lies right beside the end of time.

I know that I will feel the most overwhelming knowledge of her, and of her life and of my love for her, in the last moments. I need to do my damnedest to be there for that. Because it will be the most beautiful, the most intense, the most enriching experience of life I've ever known. When she dies.

So I am staying home, and I am listening to her snore and wheeze, and reveling in the swampiest, most awful breath that ever emanated from an angel.

And I am asking for your blessing.

I'll be seeing you.

Love,
Fiona

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Krissy
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PostSubject: Re: Fiona Apple   Wed Nov 21, 2012 9:55 am

wow.poor dog.


“Tomorrow is a new day with no mistakes in it... Yet.” ― L.M. Montgomery, Anne of Green Gables
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Savannah
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PostSubject: Re: Fiona Apple   Wed Nov 21, 2012 10:32 am

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Krissy
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PostSubject: Re: Fiona Apple   Wed Nov 21, 2012 10:53 am

It shows she must love her dog so much


“Tomorrow is a new day with no mistakes in it... Yet.” ― L.M. Montgomery, Anne of Green Gables
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julmer70
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PostSubject: Re: Fiona Apple   Wed Nov 21, 2012 11:12 am

I understand how she feels. I would react the same way if anything were to happen to my Roxy. I also know how heartbreaking it is to lose a pet. We lost our german shephard/husky mix, Duke, on 12/26/06. That year, Christmas was devastating for all of us, because he was in so much pain that night. He was put down the day after. He was 15 years old; and we had him since he was 6 weeks old! I still miss him so much. bawling

Now we have our Roxy, and she is such a blessing to us. We got her from the shelter and we adopted her. She was 4 months old at the time...she is now 3. Still very young...but I don't even want to think about how we will feel the day we lose her. She is the sweetest dog. She's my baby girl! I'm home this week, and as I sit here and type this, she is laying down right beside me. She is SO happy I'm home! I feel so much love. Smile

Good for Fiona...as family and loved ones should ALWAYS come first!
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Savannah
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PostSubject: Re: Fiona Apple   Wed Nov 21, 2012 11:24 am

I completely agree, Julie. People who have never had a pet don't understand how much they really do become a part of the family. They're just a very-hairy family member. My first cat had been with me through a very serious illness, and had never left my side. He was such a sweet, gentle little friend...and when he was diagnosed with incurable cancer, I was devastated that there was nothing that I could do to help the little one who had been of such help to me. His death was one of the hardest things I'd ever experienced - but I wouldn't have traded BEING there for him for anything. Making the choice to be there for her little buddy is one that I don't think Fiona Apple will ever regret making.
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Krissy
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PostSubject: Re: Fiona Apple   Wed Nov 21, 2012 12:17 pm

I understand too.I was sad when my dog died.I cried and cried


“Tomorrow is a new day with no mistakes in it... Yet.” ― L.M. Montgomery, Anne of Green Gables
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Kristina
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PostSubject: Re: Fiona Apple   Wed Nov 21, 2012 2:13 pm

Janet the Pit Bull is very lucky to have such a wonderful, loving 'mom.' Lisa, you are very right; some people don't understand how easily pets become part of the family. My Aunt and Uncle have two sons, both around my age, and they also have three Golden Retrievers. Most of the time when they say 'the boys', they mean my two cousins and the three dogs as well. I can't imagine how devastated Fiona Apple is, knowing that Janet is very ill, but I hope she finds comfort in knowing she was there to help ease Janet's pain.
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Rhonda
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PostSubject: Re: Fiona Apple   Wed Nov 21, 2012 2:35 pm

Love bawling



CANCER FREE!!!  April 9, 1998-April 9, 2016-I AM A SURVIVOR!!!
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Vanesa
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PostSubject: Re: Fiona Apple   Thu Nov 22, 2012 2:15 am

Oh...She made me think of my dear cat, Shariff! He died from a stomach cancer ...I'm crying now... cryB bawling Blue

Vanesa.


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Krissy
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PostSubject: Re: Fiona Apple   Thu Nov 22, 2012 12:42 pm

Blue Smiley Hug


“Tomorrow is a new day with no mistakes in it... Yet.” ― L.M. Montgomery, Anne of Green Gables
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