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 Don't Mess With God!

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pamh36
flatbroke
Rhonda
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Rhonda
Prairie Survivor
Prairie Survivor
Rhonda


Number of posts : 21216
Location : On my bike!!!
Mood : Don't Mess With God! Purple2

Don't Mess With God! Empty
PostSubject: Don't Mess With God!   Don't Mess With God! EmptyFri Apr 11, 2008 7:25 am

In the beginning, God created heaven and earth.

Then God said, "Let there be light."

Shortly thereafter God was in receipt of a notice to show cause why he shouldn't be cited for failure to file an environmental impact statement. He was granted a temporary planning permit for the project, but was stymied by a Cease and Desist Order for the earthly part. At the hearing, God was asked why he began his earthly project in the first place.

He replied that he just liked to be creative.

Officials immediately demanded to know how the light would be made.

Would it require strip mining? What about thermal pollution?

God explained that the light would come from a huge ball of fire, and provisional approval was granted with the proviso that no smoke would result.

The authorities demanded the issuance of a building permit, and (to conserve energy) required that the light be left off half the time.

God agreed, saying he would call the light "Day" and the darkness "Night."

Officials replied that they were only interested in protecting the environment, not in semantics.

God said, "Let the earth bring forth green herb and such as many seed."

The EPA agreed, so long as only native seed was used.

Then God said, "Let waters bring forth creeping creatures having life; and the fowl that may fly over the earth."

Officials pointed out this would require approval from the Department of Game coordinated with the Heavenly Wildlife Federation and the Audubongelic Society.

Everything went along smoothly until God declared that he intended to complete the project in six days.

Officials informed God it would take at least 200 days to review his many waiver applications and environmental impact statements. After that there would have to be a public hearing, and then there would be a 10-12 month probationary period before....

At this point, God created Hell.
:think:

ROTFL


Don't Mess With God! Rhonda10Don't Mess With God! Lauram10
CANCER FREE!!!  April 9, 1998-April 9, 2023-I AM A SURVIVOR!!!
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flatbroke
Man of Constant Sorrow
Man of Constant Sorrow
flatbroke


Number of posts : 2648
Mood : Don't Mess With God! Party010

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PostSubject: Re: Don't Mess With God!   Don't Mess With God! EmptyFri Apr 11, 2008 7:58 am

Oh man. I wasn't ready for that. ROTFL
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pamh36
Ingalls Friend for Life
Ingalls Friend for Life
pamh36


Number of posts : 5900
Location : Michigan

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PostSubject: Re: Don't Mess With God!   Don't Mess With God! EmptyFri Apr 11, 2008 8:08 am

:Hahaha:


Don't Mess With God! PamKeeper
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PostSubject: Re: Don't Mess With God!   Don't Mess With God! EmptyFri Apr 11, 2008 9:20 am

:Hahaha: my side hurts.... :Hahaha:
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Farmer Girl
Li'l Miss Milk Maid
Li'l Miss Milk Maid
Farmer Girl


Number of posts : 2578
Location : Right here!
Mood : Don't Mess With God! Goodsi10

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PostSubject: Re: Don't Mess With God!   Don't Mess With God! EmptyFri Apr 11, 2008 1:21 pm

:haha:


Don't Mess With God! FGKeeper


~ Home is the nicest word there is ~

Don't Mess With God! Little
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ChristinaAL
Little House Lady
Little House Lady
ChristinaAL


Number of posts : 2761

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PostSubject: Re: Don't Mess With God!   Don't Mess With God! EmptyFri Apr 11, 2008 4:30 pm

Makes sense, doesn't it? ROTFL


Don't Mess With God! ChristinaKeeper2 Don't Mess With God! 10bChristina

"It is still best to be honest and truthful; to make the most of what we have; to be happy with simple pleasures and to be cheerful and have courage when things go wrong."
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Vanesa
Ingalls Friend for Life
Ingalls Friend for Life
Vanesa


Number of posts : 5136
Location : Buenos Aires, Argentina
Mood : Don't Mess With God! Bokmal10

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PostSubject: Re: Don't Mess With God!   Don't Mess With God! EmptyFri Apr 11, 2008 4:54 pm

Oh, Rhondaaaa!!!! ROTFL

Vanesa.


Don't Mess With God! Vanesa10
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carolineingalls
Farm Land Owner
Farm Land Owner
carolineingalls


Number of posts : 1209
Location : Northern Ireland
Mood : Don't Mess With God! Pbucket

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PostSubject: Re: Don't Mess With God!   Don't Mess With God! EmptySat Apr 12, 2008 3:51 am

ROTFL

Glad it's not only here in the UK that sso-called Political Correctness has gone nuts!


Don't Mess With God! MaureenKeeper

"To change your life takes a lot of courage and energy. It's not for wimps." Karen Grassle. April 2006
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PostSubject: Re: Don't Mess With God!   Don't Mess With God! Empty

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