Hi all. I received terrible news last night. My good friend Barbara, who lived in SC, passed away on 5/24. I've never actually met her personally; however, we were close friends for about 14 years. We "met" because we were both Nelson fans (the Nelson twins, Rick Nelson's sons) and we met on a forum very much like this one. I actually made a lot of good friends there...some I got to meet, some I unfortunately never got to meet. I lost touch with many of them over the years, but Barbara and I never lost touch. I remember when my grandma passed away in 2002, she sent me the most beautiful card. She was a very religious person and very close to God...and she would always be such an inspiration to me. Now we were FB friends, and we stayed in touch through there a lot. We've talked on the phone a few times over the years...and the last time I actually spoke to her was about a year ago, when she had just had a heart attack and was at the hospital. It's strange...even when I didn't say so...she would always know when I was down because she would always send me inspirational things when I most needed it. She would always claimed that God spoke to her...and there were times when I was skeptical about that. But, in time, I actually believed her. She said He speaks to all of us...just some of us choose not to listen (I am so guilty of that, I admit it).
The last time I heard from her was actually a month ago...and I now realize it was just a week before her passing. She sent me a text message...with Psalm 23 on it. Ironically, that's "The Lord is My Shepherd!" She told me God told her to send it to me. She said she asked Him why, and He told her "it wasn't for her to know." Now as I read that verse again, it almost sounds like she was saying goodbye to me...and letting me know she was going to be alright now.
I wish I had known sooner...but I had no idea. A mutual friend of ours on FB, who I also got to meet on that Nelson forum, found out about it because she went to her timeline to say hi to her. She saw all the posts from her daughters. She called me immediately and she assumed I knew, but I didn't. Her timeline posts weren't coming to my newsfeed. I think I know why too...I may have actually blocked her posts from my FB newsfeed. I feel guilty about that now...and it wasn't because of her personally or because I didn't love her. She and I have opposite political beliefs...and though we never discussed that (I don't discuss politics at all, with ANYBODY), she was one of the people who unfortunately kept posting political stuff. While I didn't delete anyone (I wouldn't do that, everyone is entitled to their opinion), I basically blocked all the political freaks...especially the ones belonging to that particular party...from their posts coming into my newsfeed. I just want my page to remain politics-free. But now, because of that, I found out about her passing a few weeks late.
She was also not much older than me...she was 47 (her 48th birthday is next month). She also had a 3-year-old grandson she adored, and she always went on and on about her daughters. She was a very loving wife and mom, and a great friend who I will miss dearly. I'm also trying hard not to be sad...I know that's the last thing in the world she would want for me! I can also hear her telling me that she is with God now, and that everything is fine...and for me to be happy for her. Still I am in so much shock...and I never did get to tell her how much she means to me. I'm hoping somehow...she knows that.
Thanks for letting me vent...and please, if you can say prayers for her family...I would really appreciate it! Thank you again for listening. Love you all!